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Writer's pictureMariony Enid

Sin los cantazos no se aprende (Without the Knocks, One Doesn't Learn)


When I was a little girl, every time I skinned my knee or stubbed my toe, my mother would gather me in her arms, whispering, “De los cantazos se aprende.” With those words, she wove a spell, promising that pain held the seeds of wisdom, that bruises were the footprints of growth. What I wouldn’t give to be that little girl again, believing in the magic of my mother’s consolations.

This year has been an unrelenting storm, a hurricane that has tested every anchor and foundation in my life. Layoffs, new jobs, health scares, financial whirlwinds—each day a fresh challenge, each night a battleground of anxiety and exhaustion. This past month, especially, has been a tempest. Our lives have been turned inside out, reshaped by forces beyond our control. Despair gripped me like a relentless vine, wrapping tighter and tighter until I could scarcely breathe. Pain, anger, frustration—they became my constant companions, whispering dark thoughts and urging rash decisions. There were moments when I stood on the brink of choices I knew I would regret, moments when despair whispered that life as I knew it was over.

In those dark days, my mind became a labyrinth, each turn leading to another wall of doubt and fear. The weight of my own complexity, the shifting sands of my mental landscape, made daily life a struggle. Yet, as days turned to weeks, a strange clarity began to emerge from the chaos. Pain, once a relentless tormentor, began to transform into a teacher. Anger softened into empathy, and frustration into a fragile but illuminating clarity. Each emotion that had once threatened to consume me became a stepping stone to understanding, a bridge to forgiveness.

There are still things I will never understand, mysteries that will always elude me. But I have learned to respect the vast landscape of human emotion, to honor the different ways people navigate their own storms. This year has taught me that we are all flawed, stumbling through life and often tripping over our own good intentions. The key is in open, honest conversation, in seeing each other eye to eye rather than through the distorted lens of hearsay. I’ve learned the hard way that truth is a precious commodity, often lost in translation.

Choosing who we share our lives with, both family and friends, is an act of delicate discernment. People are never perfect, and judgment without understanding is a trap. It’s a lesson I’ve learned deeply—never to entangle myself in the intricate, private dance of others. It’s a dance I’m not meant to lead or even follow.

Life is a relentless river, always moving, always changing. I've come to see that some changes must be hard, must cut deep, so that we can find the strength to focus on what truly matters. Even when faced with challenges that feel overwhelming, I choose love. I choose to live without the weight of hate, without the dark cloak of judgment. My heart has no room for it, and its presence is a poison I refuse to drink.

As I reflect under the serene glow of the moon, I realize the gentle reminder of its phases—each change, each cycle, teaching us that darkness is followed by light, and waning is followed by growth. The moon, with its silent wisdom, mirrors our own journey of transformation. And transformation is needed for growth.

I want to be at peace, to love without barriers or reservations. I have always respected others' boundaries, and it hurts even more when I avoid misunderstandings. No matter how much we learn each day, each moment, every day is a new lesson; a new beginning, a fresh canvas waiting to be painted with the colors of experience. I am eternally grateful for the memories of joy, for the moments of laughter, and the love that will still shine like the bright reflection of that same moon that one day illuminated us.

In the end, it’s true—sin los cantazos no se aprende. Without the knocks and bruises, without the trials and tribulations, we would never grow, never learn, never become the people we are meant to be. And so, I embrace the pain, the lessons, the journey. For in each cantazo lies the promise of a brighter, wiser tomorrow.


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Cantazos, in the context of this story, refers to the bumps, bruises, and hardships we encounter in life. The term is derived from the Spanish word "cantazo," which typically means a hard knock or blow. 

Metaphorically, it signifies the challenges and painful experiences that teach us valuable lessons and help us grow. The phrase "sin los cantazos no se aprende" translates to "without the knocks, one doesn't learn," emphasizing that adversity often brings wisdom and personal growth.

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