El amor entra por la cocina (Love Begins in the Kitchen)

When I was a little girl, my grandma often said, "The way to a man's heart is through the kitchen. Keep him well-fed both in the bedroom and the kitchen, and he will never leave you." This was her mantra, even though it never quite worked for her.

Back then, my grandparents owned a bustling restaurant. My grandma would cook from the crack of dawn until late into the night, only taking breaks when she was visiting family or unwell. My grandpa, on the other hand, managed the money. According to him, men were the only ones capable of handling finances since women would supposedly squander it all. The irony was that he was the one who needed frequent trips to Santo Domingo to "rest."

For over 25 years, she ran a thriving business, often at the expense of spending time with her children. The restaurant saw many late nights, especially with the steady stream of drunks craving her "asopao" at three in the morning. This was just another typical night for a woman in late 1960s Puerto Rico.

Years later, a longtime friend of my grandmother came to our house with shocking news: she had seen my grandfather with another woman. Both my grandmother and mother confronted him. His response was astonishing. He turned to my mother and asked her to tell his lover not to leave him because he couldn’t live without her—all while my grandmother watched silently.

After that incident, my grandmother moved in with us. Yet, my grandfather still came to our house every day. She continued to cook for him, wash his clothes, and occasionally clean for him. Her reasoning was simple: he was still her children's father.

Now, many years later, I reflect on these events with a mix of admiration and bewilderment. My grandma still lives with my parents, and so does my grandpa. They argue more than they talk, but I’ve come to see it as their unique way of showing affection. When I told my grandma I was getting married, she smiled and reminded me, "Remember, the way to a man's heart is through the kitchen." I quickly replied, "Then I'm glad I can't cook," and we laughed until tears streamed down our faces.

Asopao con tostones